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Relationship CoachingYour happiness, your well-being, your joy, your
success, and so much more, depends on you. Start now. Make a change in your
life now. Recognize that you are the creator of your destiny. Don’t
continue to live in misery, unhappiness, despair, fear, sorrow, and
pain.
When a relationship goes sour, when a couple no longer feels madly
in love, when daily life seems to have ground to a slow halt, when now there is
boredom where before there was ecstasy, when now fighting is the norm rather
than laughter, joy, and love-making, you can be certain that the two
individuals who make up the couple would do well to inform themselves about
what this means, more than just the superficially obvious.
Relationship
coaching is walking a fine line between both members of the couple. Both need
to feel a bond with the therapist, and both need to feel empathy. Judgement and
criticism need to remain outside the walls of the room where therapy takes
place, as therapy must take place somewhere safe, a room where acceptance
resonates along with the decoration.
How do I handle couples in the
throes of marital (or partnership) uprisings? How do I “fix” the one
who is “sick”, so that the “other”, frequently
misunderstood and maligned member of the couple can finally have a happy
life?
I do none of that.
That’s right. I do none of
that.
Relationship coaching is not about who is sick and who right and
wrong, and how can we fix the wrong one, so that the right one can get on with
it. Relationship coaching is not about finger-pointing, blaming, whining and
complaining.
Relationship Coaching is, however, about many
things:
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Understanding that there is a dance between the partners that got them to where
they currently are.
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While the dance may have its origin in each partner’s childhood, the
important thing is to work on the now, much more than working on the past. You
live now, your life is now, let’s resolve the now.
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Understanding that both are each other’s greatest possibility for growth,
not only psychologically and emotionally, but also spiritually, no matter what
has already occurred, if they so choose.
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Learning to become conscious and aware of themselves at all times.
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Realizing there is always a choice in everything they feel, say, and do, both
when initiated solely by one of them, or when it takes place in reaction to the
other…no matter what the other has said or done, or neglected to say or
do.
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Taking responsibility for their own lives and happiness and frame of
mind.
These
points are fundamental in the resolution of relationship difficulties, and take
their time not only to digest and understand, but also to put into practice. As
with any new muscle that is being strengthened by toning exercises, it takes a
while for the eye to see the firming of the flesh. So too, the changes
recommended in the work that I do with you, take a while to manifest in the
outer life. But not long, as in the end, it depends totally on your own desire
and decision to go ahead with them.
Your happiness, your well-being,
your joy, your success, and so much more, depends on you. Start now. Make a
change in your life now. Recognize that you are the creator of your destiny.
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